BDSM and Mental Health

BDSM and Bipolar for me is a wonderful combination!

While they might not be a great combination for my submissive, it works for me. LOL. I love the feel of release as I inflict pain on my submissive. The weight of the world leaving my mind for that short time as I force the submissive to do things they normally would not do in their true mindset.

Maybe it’s time to find that submissive again. After all it has been a few years since I have had one that wasn’t online. LOL

I’ve come to the realization that my Dominant side is a hiding technique. A way for me to inflict on another the pain I am feeling inside my head and heart. Thats where the Bipolar plays in. Because I am just that confused, I feel I need to give someone else the pain I’m feeling but in a different way. They get the pain through whippings, floggings, humiliation, CBT, and Mind Control (as well as many other ways), I have the pain in my head.

Hum: New thought! Maybe it’s not my Bipolar that instigates this, but my Borderline Personality Disorder since it supposedly is what triggers my emotions where relationships are concerned.

For me, BDSM is not about SEX as it is for most. I don’t personally use it as a sexual release. But here is the clincher; I’m submissive to my partner.

For me being submissive means going into another world, a world where someone else takes over and dominates my existence. So what is my true calling then? That of a Dominant or that of a submissive? I hate the term “switch” as I don’t feel that is me at all. Your either Dominant or submissive, there really is no in between.

I’m confused! LOL